PAIN and Jaclyn Smith

I have met all sorts of people in the course of my job at the clinic where I've been stationed for 12 years now. Let's just say that I have had the privilege of seeing and experiencing for myself how people can either be nice or simply unpleasant when they chose to be. Overall, though, I can say that I have met quite interesting characters, too -- people who have left a good and lasting impression on me. One of them was a young, petite lady named Jacqueline Smith. No kidding. Jacqueline Smith! I remember smiling when I saw her name on the form I had asked her to fill out and she just smiled back and told me she knew what I was thinking.

"Jacqueline Smith?" I grinned at her. Jaclyn Smith, I mean, THE actress, was my favorite Charlie's Angel. I was just a kid then but I got hooked into watching Charlie's Angels so much I started entertaining ideas of becoming a lady Detective when I grew up.

"Yeah," she replied, "Not the Charlie's Angel, though. Just call me Jackie."

When I first met Jackie Smith at the clinic, she had been working for a bank in Digos City. She later told me that her father was of American descent, hence, her American surname. Everytime Jackie came to the clinic, she and I would often engage in friendly chats while waiting for my boss to arrive. I'd never been much of a talker and I seldom warm up easily to strangers but Jackie seemed to have a way of getting people to warm up to her or something. She was very nice and what I liked most about her was the way she'd never forget to say "God Bless You" shortly before leaving.

It was amazing, the way we found it easy to talk about life and Religious faith without butting heads. Jackie was a Born-again Christian and I've always been a Catholic who'd remain a Catholic for the rest of my days. It was all about RESPECT, I guess. I respected her faith and she had all respect for mine and what made it easier, probably, was how we talked not about our differences but about WHO we had in common -- Jesus.

I don't know where Jackie Smith is now. She hasn't been to the clinic in years. But, I'd like to share an excerpt from the audio tape that I once borrowed from her long ago. What the speaker talked about in that audio tape was PAIN. It helped me a lot and I hope it can be of help to you, too.

Here's the excerpt I managed to jot down:

"PAIN TEACHES WHAT PLEASURE MISSES"

If you are in PAIN:

1) Because of personal Holiness/Righteousness -- thank God. You will be rewarded.
2) Because of your sins -- thank God. You are being corrected.
3) Because of other people's sins -- thank God. You are being brought into partnership and fellowship with Jesus who also went through the same path of pain.

I hope this will help anyone going through the pain of persecution. This can also serve as a reminder for everyone of us who seek to be closer to the Lord. It would do us all well to remember that IT ALWAYS HURTS TO DO THE RIGHT THING FOR GOD but let's do the right thing for God, anyway....at any cost.

God bless you all...and thank you, Jackie Smith, wherever you may be right now.

ON SUITORS (GUYS)

This was actually an essay I submitted to my English teacher during my Freshman year in College. I spent a year at the Jesuit-run Ateneo de Davao University, taking up AB ENGLISH but eventually, I moved to an allied health school (SAN PEDRO COLLEGE) to pursue the pre-med course/degree that I had always been after--BS Medical Technology. Anyway, I dunno what possessed me to write this essay that day when our English 2: Grammar and Composition professor asked the class to compose a brief essay. I've never had so many suitors or guys courting me so even I could not imagine how on earth I'd managed to write about a topic I had no experience about at that time. I guess, I probably wanted to tickle my teacher pink because she was unmarried. Maybe this really tickled her and reminded her of those times in her life when guys swarmed her like bees--she gave me the highest grade for this! Ha Ha Ha.

ON SUITORS (OR GUYS)
- - -C. Louise S./ADDU -'86-'87 AB English section D

There are many types of suitors as far as we girls are concerned. There's the guy who looks at you as though he cannot take his eyes off you even for a moment that you'd like to think his eyes would pop out any second of the day. There is the one with a genius look---spectacles and all. But, the moment he starts talking about nothing but SCI-FI's, you'd begin to think you've just found yourself a bore. There's the one with a blank smile who goes following you around like a sick puppy looking for its mother. There is the smug who starts getting fresh that somehow, you'd find yourself wishing you could punch him straight at the nose so as to make that smug look disappear from his face. There's the guy who adorns you with gifts and sends you love letters with the words obviously copied from the lines of a song that you'll find yourself saying that even if he were the last man on earth, you wouldn't touch him with a twelve-foot pole. There is that shy and soft-spoken guy who doesn't talk too much but when he does, boy! Would you hope he'd say more! At least, you've got a guy sincere enough to mean what he says.

EVEN CLOWNS CRY

I have never lacked in the UNDERSTANDING department where my friends and loved ones are concerned. Some people are so lucky they have others who'd listen to them patiently, without complaining.........just understanding and trying to give comfort the best way they can and all because they love this someone so much. Others like me, are not so lucky. Most everyone in my life only seem to come to me for one thing -- to seek comfort from me when they're hurting. But, when I am the one in need of comfort or if not that, maybe just an affectionate word or two, or someone who'd care about my hopes and dreams, they act like I'm the plague. I am ignored...like my hurting and sadness do not matter. Only theirs matter most. Most everyone in my life is the same. Well, I have endured rejection of all kinds in my lifetime. I hope it doesn't happen to you--when you knock and no one answers. When you reach out and no one responds. When you cry out but no one listens or hears you. I hope it doesn't happen to you....because you have no idea how painful it can really be. Between this kind of pain and physical pain, I would much rather deal with physical pain because, at least, I know I can take pain relievers to ward off pain momentarily. With emotional pain, there is no medication, not even for temporary relief. But, then again, why should my pain matter to you? It shouldn't eat away at you, I guess. I don't even know why I am telling you this or why I am even talking about this. You don't care. Enough said.

TO MAMA WITH LOVE

We can meet so many people in this lifetime. We can have as many friends as we want. Some can even have as many lovers as they can. But, all of us can only have ONE Mother in our lifetime. For those of you who still have mothers, love your Mom with all your heart and never forget to tell her how much you love her while she's still around to feel that love. Don't wait until it's all too late because no pain can ever compare to losing a mother. If you love someone, tell that someone NOW.

TO MAMA WITH LOVE

It's been years since, Mom,
But I still miss you.
When life wears me down
and my world is crazed and pained,
at times I find myself longing
to go back to the shelter of your womb
where I'd be safe and not be shaken
by life's troubles and adversities.
But, you're no longer around, Mom,
and that's what hurts.
But, when I look inside my heart
and find you there,
That's when I know
that out there, somewhere,
You're still watching over me
and I want to tell you now
the words I should've told you often
I loved you so, Mom,
I always have and I always will.

-- by C. Louise S

THIS THING CALLED FOREVER

And they told me it was infatuation.
That you were just a passing fancy
that came along with growing up;
and that you'd gradually fade with time.

But I knew better what it was all about.
The moment I set my eyes on you,
it was like I've always known
You'd change my life completely.

Yet they don't understand that.
They can't. Perhaps they never will.
So, I built my world around you
and heard their deafening laughter.

You are my source of strength.
The deepest breath I take,
my very heart and my very soul,
my lifeline...my everything.

And this thing called forever?
It's wearing your name like a badge on my shoulder
it means beyond all tomorrows
It's that childlike faith that guides me...
...this thing called forever.

--by: Claire S. /2007